Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
Randomize
