I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
Randomize
