I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
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So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
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This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
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