how hairy? two words: wookie tits
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
Randomize
