she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made my uber driver take a pit stop between clubs so we could restock on Xanax. #priorities
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
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