i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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