Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
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