So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
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