Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize