ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
She told me I should be a condom model.
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
Randomize
