PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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