I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
I think I've given more of my business cards to Chipotle trying to win free burritos than anyone else
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
Randomize
