Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
Randomize
