I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
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