their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
Randomize
