ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Randomize
