Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
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