Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
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