it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
Randomize
