So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
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