If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
i've created a new STD.
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
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