Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
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