the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
Randomize
