So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
I just slammed another champagne, swaggered over to her, pointed across the room at the 20 y/o lacrosse player and whispered loudly, "I brought that one for YOU." I'm getting a raise.
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
Randomize
