hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
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