We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Randomize