Hey man sorry I got all grabby
people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
You tipped the Uber driver extra for taking your phone away while you were drunk texting
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
Randomize
