he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
Is it bad that when someone says the phrase "helicopter dick" I immediately think of you?
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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