I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
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She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
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I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
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