yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
Randomize
