I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
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