How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
I still have a little drunk in my system
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
Last night i walked into a gas station to get condoms. I threw them on the counter and the guy gave me a funny look because i was wearing a bra under an open cardigan and no shoes. I screamed "DONT JUDGE ME!" and he gave them to me for free.
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
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