Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
Those nachos came to me in a dream
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
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