if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
Randomize
