Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
Randomize
