Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize
