Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
Randomize
