wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
we found you in the kitchen at five am trying to make a vodka omelette. you said you didn't want to live in a world where your two favourite things couldn't be together.
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
Thank you for not boning my boss.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
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