it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
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