Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
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