hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
Randomize
