Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
