I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
I will be naked everywhere
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Randomize