Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize