I feel like I'm in dance class right now
for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
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