all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
Randomize
