i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
my nose is crying tears of wow.
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
We are all done wearing pants today
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
I'm currently watching porn and playing beer pong with wine in the lobby of a hotel with a squadron of hot airforce guys. You can never say your life is better than mine again
Dude I left his house at 5:30 a.m. after you peed on his front door and then tried to fight me for my blanket. Don't even do that at my house or I will end you.
hahahahaha. Worst. Text. Ever.
Randomize
