I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
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