Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
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