Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
Why does my car smell like burnt toast?
I take it you don't remember trying to make grilled cheese with your cigarette lighter...
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
Randomize
