I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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